| (no subject) |
[Aug. 24th, 2009|07:19 am] |
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Have any of you fine folks ever used Cafe Press? What did you think of it? Specifically, how was the quality, and what were they like to deal with? |
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| I think there's a Tardis in my mixer. |
[Jul. 26th, 2009|06:07 pm] |
About a week ago we made a pizza with a crust from a gluten-free mix. It turned out pretty good except for being too thick. So, last night we tried the mix again, figuring that if we split the dough in half and made two pizzas, they would be just about the right thickness.
It made two pizzas the same size as last week's giant thick pizza.
We could feed the world this way. |
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This one's for ![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif) leathersub |
[Jul. 12th, 2009|11:34 am] |
Things a well-behaved sub will not do:
* Sing "Happy Birthday To Me" during wax play and blow out the candle.
* In the middle of an intense cropping, close your eyes and start to snore.
* During a scene, do a Howard Cosell impression and provide a play-by-play account of what is being done to you.
* If your dom/me tells you to "Look me in the eyes," do it cross-eyed.
* If your dom/me decides to do a verbal humiliation scene with you in public, stick your fingers in your ears and say "Neener, neener, neener, I can't hear you!"
* Stick an Alka-Seltzer tablet in your mouth at the beginning of a scene. Work up some saliva to get it fizzy, then call out your safeword.
* If you're trussed up and ordered to count, inform your top you can't do it unless you can use your fingers and toes.
* Hold up a scorecard after each blow delivered.
* Tell your dom/me a better way to do whatever it is being done to you at that moment.
* After a particularly hard blow, pretend to pass out. When your dom/me checks to see if you're OK, jump up and yell "Gotcha!"
* Go in the toybag and superglue the nipple clamps shut.
* Attach clappers to all the outlets in the dungeon just before a paddling (Clap on! Clap off!)
* "Oh my god, where did you get those, they are gorgeous!!!" is not considered boot worship.
* Flipping your dominant off while your hands are cuffed behind your back is a bad idea. Owners have ways of knowing these things.
* Kicking that toy you hate far under the bed is futile. Master will only secure your wristcuffs to your anklecuffs and make you crawl for it... repeatedly.
* Doing your Beavis and Butthead imitation of "Fire, fire, fire, fire!" during Master's lecture on fireplay safety is considered rude.
* Responding with "Yes, All Wise, All Knowing Grand Imperial Weenie" is not appropriate when Master asks you if you are comfortable during a bondage scene.
* Asking to go to the bathroom every five minutes while Master practices his Japanese rope work on you will try his patience, quickly.
* Crossing your eyes and sticking your tongue out while your dominant is discussing your punishment is not wise.
* Pretending Master's collection of buttplugs are toys and singing the "Weebles wobble but they won't fall down" song is not a good idea.
* Checking Master's head for the 666 symbol after a harsh punishment will only get you more of the same, or worse.
* "I know you are but what am I?" is not the appropriate response when called a raunchy little whore during humiliation play.
* "Missed me, missed me, now ya gotta kiss me" is an unacceptable remark when Master's flogger slips.
* When Master pulls out his bullwhip and says he wants to play, he doesn't mean hide-and-seek... He will find you eventually.
* "Oh, and you think I am?" is an unacceptable response to hearing your dominant say he is not pleased.
* During a play party is not the time to do your hilarious imitation of Igor and hunch over, moaning "Yes, Master" when ordered to fetch something.
* Adding "Sir" or "Master" to "Fuck that plan!" will not save you.
* Singing the chorus of "Anything You Can Do, I Can Do Better" under your breath during a session is considered foolhardy.
* Reciting nursery rhymes during an interrogation scene to crack your Owner up only lasts for so long. Then you will pay BIG.
* Asking "Is that as HARD as you can hit??" is considered a cry for help amongst submissive suicide prevention workers. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jul. 4th, 2009|10:02 am] |
Tuck said the sweetest thing to me yesterday.
As a small background, he watches a show called Super Why!, and the main character is a superhero who has flying shoes that look a whole lot like Tucker's sneakers.
So, Tucker and his dad were outside jumping off the low wall in the yard, and Tucker said, "Daddy jump high sky Super Why shoes jump up up up to moon and also Tucker jump high sky to moon and down and down and have it moon give to Mama."
Who cares if he doesn't say, "I love you," yet? My boy wants to give me the moon. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 29th, 2009|02:38 pm] |
Last night the sleeping was better. Or different, anyways. Not worse. Tucker took about an hour to wind down to sleep, but at least he was happy about it. He alternated between singing "Itsy Bitsy Spider" and "Bluebells", which is a jumprope rhyme for the littlest jumpers. Then he would play with the touch lamp and pull out kleenexes and rub them on my face. Fun times.
I had a party to go to a few days ago, a potluck. I found a recipe online for the most amazing appetizer ever, called A Date With A Pig. Couldn't have been easier: wrap half a slice of bacon around a date and bake. For best results, do lots of dates at once, like speed dating. Awesome! |
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| There is too much; let me sum up |
[Jun. 28th, 2009|02:36 pm] |
Big things:
My mother was diagnosed with two kinds of cancer. Fortunately, her doctor expects that it will be at least a decade before they need to do anything more than just keep an eye on it.
Miles' mother has been having a really rough few months. It all started with a broken bone in her pelvis. As one thing healed something else would crop up. She's been "all better except for the (blank)" so many times it's hard to keep track. Finally, now, I think she really is all better. She just needs to get used to being up and around again.
Miles' grandmother died. It was a blessing; she hadn't been herself for so long. She left us some money. Not enough for us to retire and run away to Monte Carlo (sorry, all my friends there!) but enough that we don't have to worry about making mortgage payments for a while. That's really good, considering I haven't brought in any money since Tucker was born. We were also able to upgrade some things and replace some other things that have really needed upgrading and replacing.
Littler things:
We have a new dog. Shandy is (was, if I must be honest) my mother-in-law's dog. She was perfectly nice for a visit, but I wish she could go back. She gets on well with our dogs and with our son, has decent house manners, and is very sweet, but she had almost no training. Walks on leash are like the Iditarod, while off leash she's deaf. I really didn't need another toddler in the house to keep track of, you know?
Boy things:
Tucker is 2-1/2 now. He's finally been weaned (since the beginning of May!) and we're making some small progress with potty training. Last night for the first time he slept (mostly) in his own bed in his own room. I had to go to him twice, but he fell back asleep very quickly. Then at around 4:00 he came into our room to spend the rest of the night with us. I hope this easy first night wasn't a fluke, because this kid has become a serious bed hog. I love sleeping with him, but the thrashing and crossways sleeping isn't working anymore. With luck, we'll all three end up sleeping better after the transition.
I can't think of a lot else right now. I want to start actually using this journal again. We'll see how that works out. |
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| video! |
[Jan. 15th, 2009|08:37 pm] |
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| (no subject) |
[Dec. 16th, 2008|08:05 pm] |
I'm so proud - Tucker is quoting movies already, just a few months after learning to talk. Specifically, he does the "No, no, no!/Yes, yes, yes!" routine from Singin' in the Rain.
He also tells us there's a giant rabbit in the closet. But when he tries to show us, the rabbit hides. It could be worse; apparently it's a good rabbit. And today we learned that he wears shoes. Only shoes.
Kids are weird. |
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| (no subject) |
[Dec. 6th, 2008|08:27 pm] |
Tonight Tucker was playing tea party with two measuring cups. It was so cute, but so out of the blue. He would pour nothing from one cup to the other, then drink. He called, "Daddy! Daddy!" and pointed to the cup on the desk. Miles picked it up and drank, and I thought all the yelling and spitting was him playing it up for the boy. See, I'd noticed the Bert from Sesame Street sticker that Tuck had placed in the cup, and I just figured Miles was doing something like, "Oh, I almost drank Bert! Yucky!" But, no. Cunningly hidden under the sticker was a great big pool of drool.
He's an evil, evil monkey! |
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| from siochembio |
[Dec. 1st, 2008|08:10 pm] |
01. Name a movie that you have seen more than 10 times: Lots of them. Ghostbusters, Trading Places, and since Tucker has started watching movies, Wallace & Gromit: Curse of the Were-Rabbit.
02. Name a movie that you've seen multiple times in a theatre: Conan the Barbarian. No, really. I and some friends from the SCA did a short fighting demonstration before the movie started.
03. Name an actor that would make you more inclined to see a movie: There are plenty that get an "Oooh!" reaction from me when I see them in the cast, but Bruce Campbell can turn a crappy cheesy movie into something fun for me every time.
04. Name an actor that would make you less likely to see a movie: Jack Black, Jim Carrey, Robin Williams. They are all great sometimes, but they have to be reined in hard to avoid being insufferable.
05. Name a movie that you can quote from: So many! Ferris Bueller, Star Wars, A Fish Called Wanda.
06. Name a movie musical that you know all the lyrics to all the songs: Grease, Little Shop of Horrors.
07. Name a movie that you have been known to sing along with: Both of the above movies, plus The Pirates of Penzance, The Sound of Music, pretty much anything I know any of the words to.
08. Name a movie that you would recommend everyone see: I love Return to Me.
09. Name a movie that you own: Just one? Clue.
10. Name an actor that launched his/her entertainment career in another medium but who has surprised you with his/her acting chops. Steve Martin.
11. Have you ever seen a movie in a drive-in? Oh, yes.
12. Ever made out in a movie? That's what drive-ins are for!
13. Name a movie that you keep meaning to see but just haven't gotten around to it: I am very eager to see the new X-Files movie, on DVD tomorrow!
14. Ever walked out of a movie? Not on purpose. I got very sick and missed the end of one of the Pirates of the Caribbean movies, but I went back another week to finish it.
15. Name a movie that made you cry in the theater: Name one that hasn't! The most recent one was Wall-E.
16. Popcorn? Naturally.
17. How often do you go to the movies? Rarely anymore. Before the baby we went a couple of times a month. Tucker is two, and we've seen two since he was born.
18. What's the last movie you saw in the theater? Wall-E.
19. What is your favorite/preferred genre of movie? Comedies, light action, adventure.
20. What was the first movie you remember seeing in the theater? I saw Jaws at the drive-in. I hit my head hard on the ceiling when the shark jumped out.
21. What movie do you wish you had never seen? Probably something horror. Simply bad movies I don't waste time regretting, but movies that put awful pictures in my head I could do without.
22. What is the weirdest movie you enjoyed? What's weird? Bubba Ho-Tep, I suppose.
23. What is the scariest movie you've ever seen? The Ring. Scary movie that I will never see: any of the Saw movies. I could live quite happily never seeing any of that.
24. What is the funniest movie you've ever seen? The Aristocrats was fabulously filthy and disturbing. I'm sure it was at least partly the shock value, but I was convulsing in my seat. Miles actually fell out of his! |
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| (no subject) |
[Nov. 22nd, 2008|03:36 pm] |
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Tucker's become interested in gender differences. During diaper changes, he says, "Tucker, Daddy... Mama NOT." |
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| Halloween pics |
[Nov. 2nd, 2008|07:42 pm] |
Here's my little guy. Some people guessed that he was Peter Pan or a Lost Boy, but really, he was just a tree.
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| (no subject) |
[Oct. 26th, 2008|07:40 pm] |
The longer I go without posting, the harder it is to do.
Everything is going well, lots of new exciting things going on from a mommy's perspective which I imagine would be Dullsville for anyone outside the family. We're getting ready for Halloween at the moment. I had planned on making up a classic orange-faced Ooompa Loompa costume for the boy, as it's one of his favorite movies. At the last minute I've decided it will be way too hot to inflict tights and a turtleneck and facepaint on a not-quite-two-year-old. Instead, I'm turning the brown clothes I've already bought into an apple tree costume. Still don't know exactly how I'm attaching the leaves/apples/bird's nest, but I think it will be plenty cute. This will probably be the last year I get to choose his costume; he's pretty darned opinionated already.
A month or two ago Tucker started talking. Now that's exciting! It's almost spooky how quickly he picks up new words, but I understand it's very typical. Right now he's only speaking in single words, but he's stringing them together in near-sentences. He sounds like he's on Password, being careful to put a beat between each of his clues.
I'm still staying home full time, doing what I can to help out with the nursery. Since there's no one else to watch Tucker, that's not much. I'm so lucky, though, to be able to spend every day with him. I had to go to traffic school last week, and was away from the boy for six hours. He was okay, his grandma was visiting, but I was a wreck. It was the first time we'd been apart for more than a half hour or so at a pop, and that only a couple of times. I guess that's why I have so much trouble being anything but Mama.
Anyways, that's enough for now. I read all of you and I miss you. |
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| Picspam! |
[May. 6th, 2008|04:45 pm] |
My beautiful sensitive boy. He watches Ninja Warrior on TV and cries when the contestants fall into the water. He goes crazy for flowers. He helps his mama around the house. He gives the most wonderful little hugs. He sings to himself when he plays.
Of course, he also climbs out of his high chair. He throws things. He runs and jumps on the beds, even though he's fallen off a few times. He screams so loudly and so high-pitched you'd swear someone was whistling for their dog. He runs away when I'm trying to change him. He bites, hits, and kicks, although usually only when he's overtired.
He's perfect.
( more pics ) |
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| (no subject) |
[Mar. 4th, 2008|02:36 pm] |
Gary Gygax just died.
Guess he failed his saving throw. |
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| (no subject) |
[Feb. 23rd, 2008|04:44 pm] |
I'm trying to clear out some of my old stuff to make room for new stuff. I found that I have almost 15 years' worth of high-end dog magazines -- the AKC Gazette, in case you might have heard of it. I don't want them anymore. My used bookstore probably won't give me more than a few bucks in trade credit for them.
I thought about selling them in lots on Craigslist for $10 or $20 per year, but the cover price ranges from $4 to $5. I'm not greedy -- after all, the things aren't making me a dime sitting in my closet -- but I don't want to sell them for a ridiculously cheap price, either. They don't seem too easy to come by.
It seems like it would be a huge pain in the ass to list them on eBay. I've only ever bought there, maybe it's easier than I think?
How would you sell them? |
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| (no subject) |
[Dec. 10th, 2007|12:57 pm] |
Tuckers do NOT like unpeeled oranges!
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| How to raise a geek. |
[Dec. 6th, 2007|08:46 am] |
Our bathroom is decorated with Star Wars collector's plates. Last night the baby was helping me brush my teeth before bed (and when I say helping, I mean he was sitting on the floor crying because I had to put him down for a second). Hoping to distract him, I asked, "Tucker, where's Han Solo?" He immediately quieted, turned to the wall o' plates, pointed, and said, "Dah!"
I was so proud. |
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